Memento-mori Wiki

A Conversation Part Two: A Tail of Two Kittys

Two strange shapes flitted against the walls of the sewers. One was vaguely human, the other was vaguely not. Both moved with catlike grace through the dim tunnel heading quickly and quietly towards the smells of food. Both were hungry, both were always hungry.
“It is coming from this way Cap't Bitey.” The short girl shaped one said. Her name was Fe, short for Felis Sapien Black. And she was more human than her companion though neither was by any stretch of the imagination normal. Fe was a 5 foot tall half-human half-cat, she had been made in a lab by her 'father' Dr. Aleister Black. Around her neck she wore a collar that made her look like a normal teenage girl.
Cap't Bitey had also been created in a lab, a different one, he was a genetically altered lion. They were both cats, they were both orphans, and they were both alone in creation. “I hope we have enough bits.” Fe said running her fingers through Cap't Bitey's mane.
Cap't Bitey responded with a strange robotic sounding purr.
They were very close now, the smells of the food was almost over powering That is when Fe heard a familiar voice shout out from an adjoining tunnel.
“Beady beady beady Doyle it is a trap!” The voice was tinny, robotic, and completely without inflection.
The voice that responded was, on the other hand angry and full of scorn. “I am well aware of that now Botson! Only one man could trap me in such a fiendish way!”
Fe slipped into the new tunnel, Cap't Bitey flowing through the dimly lit passage steps behind her. She came upon a large open space with several man sized tunnels leading into it. In the center of the space hanging in a steel mesh nano-net were two people Fe had met previously. Well not people really, one was a robot, but Fe didn't discriminate.
The first, and human, inhabitant of the net was Mycroft Doyle, famous private detective. He was tall, lanky with black hair and piercing grey eyes. He was wearing a grey trench coat over a rumpled brown suit. His face hadn't seen a razor in at least a day and his suit was rumpled and wet around the ankles. Both his deer stalker hat and his cane had fallen and were currently laying in the water beneath the net.
The second, robotic, net denizen was Botson, Doyle's sidekick. He was shaped like a short rotund copper man. His face consisted of a metallic mustache, nose, and fake monocle. Atop his shiny head was an equally shiny metal bowler hat, it had no fallen to the ground, despite the fact that Botson was upside down, due to the fact that it was welded on.
Before Fe could move to help her entangled friends three more men steped into the room. Two of them were obviously 'muscle'. They were tall, strong looking guys with obvious cybernetic enhancements on their musculature. Both bore scars from previous fights and both looked pretty tough, maybe even for someone like Fe.
The third man was slightly shorter than Doyle, with neck length slicked back salt and pepper hair and matching muttonchops. He wore a long black cloak over a classic black suit that looked to Fe like something a stern professor would wear. He stepped up under the net and retrieved Doyle's cane. Fe motioned for Capt Bitey to stay put and moved quietly into the large room. She positioned herself behind the two large men and hoped she was up to the challenge of taking them down. As she moved she saw Doyle's eyes briefly flick to her and then away, a small movement that few save her and Doyle himself would have noticed. The professor man must have sensed or heard something because he started to turn towards Fe's position.
“Rathe!” Doyle said suddenly pulling the man's attention back to himself. “I know all about your plan to create a chemical substance that will turn the queen's children into explosive devices! You will never get away with it. I will stop you!”
Rathe laughed maniacally, the loud sound bouncing mercilessly off of the walls of the sewer. “And how, pray tell, do you expect to stop me? Even if you had your little toy…” Rathe wiggled Doyle's cane near his face. “My net would take a stronger man than you to cut through. So tell me Doyle, what have you got up your sleeve that could possibly stop me?”
“He has me!” Fe said causing everyone in the room to look towards her. She readied herself assuming the attack would be swift and violent. Instead the two thugs stared at her their eyes dull and glazed over like the eyes of dead men.
Rathe let out another insane bout of laughter. “You? My young lady I don't know who you are or how you found us down here but you are certainly no match for my intellect, and certainly no match for my two friends. Why don't you run along now and play?”
Fe smiled her special smile at Rathe, it was more a baring of teeth than anything else. “I don't think so Mr. Teacher man. I think you should give up now before I have to hurt you.” As she spoke Fe closed her small hands into fists.
Rathe just shook his head with disdain. “Bif.” He said addressing the first goon. “Pow.” He said addressing the second. “Tear the little thing apart.”
The two goons moved forward as if they shared one brain, and for all Fe knew they did, their arms out stretched reaching for her. Fe jumped between the much slower goons leaping from a stand still to almost 7 feet in the air. She used the two automaton's shoulders to vault over them toward Rathe. Shed almost made it past when one of the goons, moving much quicker than it seemed able to before spun and back handed her solidly across the spine.
Fe flew through the air and hit the brick wall face first. It hurt a lot, and would've killed a normal girl, but all Fe felt was a little dazed.
“Well that took care of the waif, now to take care of you.” Rathe said turning his back on Fe. Rathe slowly drew Mycroft's own sword out with a snicker-snack and moved towards the net.
Suddenly from behind the professor came a loud thump and and a sickening crack. Rathe turned around and saw the small red haired girl standing atop his two thugs who were now laying prone on the floor. Bif's head looked staved in and Pow's neck was definitely broken. Fe wiped imaginary dust off her hands and grinned at Rathe.
“Sorry Mr. Teacher man, I seemed to have broken your zombie guys.”
“You!” Rathe said looking flummoxed “How? How did you do that?!”
“I'm much stronger than I look.” Fe smiled and stepped towards Rathe. “And now it's your turn.”
Rathe held the sword out in a classic fencer's pose as if readying himself to fight. Then he threw the sword wildly before turning and running from the room.
The sword missed Fe by a good foot and she shook her head ruefully. She bent over and picked up the sword as Rathe ran out through an exit tunnel.
“What are you doing?!” Doyle asked as Fe walked calmly over to the net Mycroft's sword in her hand. “Hes going to get away!”
“Naw.” Fe said shrugging. “My friend will stop the mean teacher.”
“Friend?” Doyle asked. Suddenly a loud roar sounded from the tunnel Rathe had escaped from, followed closely by a high pitched scream from Rathe.
“Cap't Bitey.” Fe responded lining up the sword with the rope holding the net up. “I rescued him from some evil lab guys, they were the same guys who had my father killed. Anyway I killed them and now me and Cap't Bitey are friends.” As she spoke Fe brought the sword down and sliced through the nano fiber rope with one slice. The net fell to the ground, Mycroft let out an “Oof!” as he landed on Botson.
“Your friend?” Mycroft asked pushing himself up and dusting himself off. “Is he part human like you?” Botson stayed on he ground, arms flailing, making a series of indignant beeps and squawks.
Just then Cap't Bitey prowled into the room with a large swatch of cloth in his mouth. The cloth was the same color as the suit Rathe had been wearing. “Ah. I see.” Cap't Bitey lay down at Fe's feet and chewed on the cloth as Mycroft helped Botson up.
Fe leaned down and petted Cap't Bitey on the top of the head. “Good job Cap't!”
“Yes.” Mycroft said dusting himself off. “Well done, er, Captain Bitey.”
“Astounding Doyle!” Botson agreed.
“Come young lady, I shall buy you dinner. I'll even get the Captain a steak, but he will have to wait until we are done to eat it.”
“Really?” Fe said sounding excited. “I AM hungry. And Cap't Bitey doesn't mind waiting. He already something to eat.” Fe smiled as Mycroft offered her his arm and the two of them walked together from the sewer, Botson and Cap't Bitey following close behind.